(no subject)

When we got him, we had that typical bout of indecisiveness that comes with trying to choose a name for a living creature. For several weeks, we just labeled him with the rather pedantic "puppy" and rationalized that we could choose an name any time. Of course, by then, he started to answer to "Puppy." To save him from the fate of a goofy name, we shifted that to "Guppy."

In retrospect, that was probably goofier, but it suited him. Noble and dignified he rarely achieved. Most of the time his nose was to the ground, following whatever scents he could, no doubt making up for his lack of sense otherwise. He loved fetch and chase and tug and all the games dogs do. He was a notorious murderer of stuffed animals and never met a squeaky toy he couldn't silence.

He had a voracious appetite and could wolf down a bowl of chow like nobody's business. Double time if you put tuna-can-water on it. Cheese and salami was his favorite treat. Once, he ate an entire box of chocolate turtles and showed no ill effects. Not surprising, given the fact that he once digested a good third of a pink, plastic Frisbee.

Between the times when he smelled like a freshly washed dog and when he stunk like he rolled in something dead, he carried an odor not unlike a bag of Frito corn chips. We had him for 13 years and he was an old, happy dog. A good, good boy.

He died today and I miss him already.
No Reginald


Feeling depressed?

Clearly, you are not constricting your anus 100 times every day.

"I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known a 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has a good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make #### three times in succession without drawing out.

Celebrity Obit

An absolute LEGEND has passed. Frank Frazetta died. He was iconic...a master of the genre. I can't imagine a fantasy artist working today that wouldn't pay the man at least some tribute. He defined what fantasy and sci-fi looked like for an entire generation of fans.

He will be missed.

(no subject)

maggie and milly and molly and may
went down to the beach(to play one day)

and maggie discovered a shell that sang
so sweetly she couldn't remember her troubles,and

milly befriended a stranded star
whose rays five languid fingers were;

and molly was chased by a horrible thing
which raced sideways while blowing bubbles:and

may came home with a smooth round stone
as small as a world and as large as alone.

For whatever we lose(like a you or a me)
it's always ourselves we find in the sea

- e.e. cummings

Adventures of Isabel - Ogden Nash

Isabel met an enormous bear,
Isabel, Isabel, didn't care;
The bear was hungry, the bear was ravenous,
The bear's big mouth was cruel and cavernous.
The bear said, Isabel, glad to meet you,
How do, Isabel, now I'll eat you!
Isabel, Isabel, didn't worry.
Isabel didn't scream or scurry.
She washed her hands and she straightened her hair up,
Then Isabel quietly ate the bear up.

Once in a night as black as pitch
Isabel met a wicked old witch.
the witch's face was cross and wrinkled,
The witch's gums with teeth were sprinkled.
Ho, ho, Isabel! the old witch crowed,
I'll turn you into an ugly toad!
Isabel, Isabel, didn't worry,
Isabel didn't scream or scurry,
She showed no rage and she showed no rancor,
But she turned the witch into milk and drank her.

Isabel met a hideous giant,
Isabel continued self reliant.
The giant was hairy, the giant was horrid,
He had one eye in the middle of his forehead.
Good morning, Isabel, the giant said,
I'll grind your bones to make my bread.
Isabel, Isabel, didn't worry,
Isabel didn't scream or scurry.
She nibbled the zwieback that she always fed off,
And when it was gone, she cut the giant's head off.

Isabel met a troublesome doctor,
He punched and he poked till he really shocked her.
The doctor's talk was of coughs and chills
And the doctor's satchel bulged with pills.
The doctor said unto Isabel,
Swallow this, it will make you well.
Isabel, Isabel, didn't worry,
Isabel didn't scream or scurry.
She took those pills from the pill concocter,
And Isabel calmly cured the doctor.